Where there's smoke

INDIA: One of the first things I notice when I leave America (which I rarely do) is that most countries are just a great big puff of cigarette smoke. Yuck. You can’t so much as walk through the Frankfurt airport without getting a sore throat and a bit of lung cancer. This time around I noticed it (i.e., smelled it) at the Amsterdam airport and notice it still in India. Was America like this at one time? I vaguely remember a time when smoking wasn’t considered a second-class activity but thankfully it seems like a long time ago.

Life isn't always easy

INDIA: I've been eating so much so fast and doing so little so much that I'm having major backpain. I guess being a lady of leisure isn't as easy you might think...

From Vijayawada with love

INDIA: When I say there were 20 babies on my flight from Amsterdam to Hyderabad I’m not exaggerating; I’m not even rounding up. In fact I know it was 20 because the KLM staff in Amsterdam felt this was crucial info and announced it over the intercom – twice. If you counted everyone under the age of three, that number would easily double. Luckily the three-year-old passenger "sitting" next to me was remarkably well-behaved and quite adorable. Anyway after getting to Hyderabad and spending a day there I’m now here in Vijayawada, widely known as the Jewel of India. Ok so I made that up, so it’s small and you can see from the “parking lot” of the airport straight through to the runway… so what? For two days now I’ve done little but eat and sleep and chat. I could get used to being a lady of leisure – no matter how small the airport. Tomorrow though I’m going to kick things up a notch and go see the latest movie starring my favorite Telugu hero, Mahesh Babu (aka Prince Mahesh Babu).

A season for all things?

There is a season for all things. You know the quote. Or is it a verse from the Bible? Anyway the point is, going by the scientific poll I put on this blog, that season isn’t Winter or Spring. I’m not surprised about Winter (yuck!), but does no one love Spring? Six people voted, and five of them voted for Fall. Only one person voted even for Summer… and I admit that one person was me. My theory? You’re all trying to convince yourselves that Fall is all that because it’s currently what season? Fall, of course. I’d love to bore you some more, but I’ve got a flight to catch. Happy Thanksgiving!

You know you're thirtysomething when...

1. Your girlfriends get glycolic peels (and you badly need one).
2. Your workout goal is no longer just to work out but to work out without getting hurt.
3. It takes 20 emails to plan one brunch – which probably ends up getting canceled.
4. You go out for “drinks” (and wonder why everyone looks so young).
5. You drive through a college campus (and wonder why everyone looks so young).
6. Twentysomethings are shocked if you’re stupid enough to tell them your age.
7. You’re wondering when to start getting regular mammograms.
8. You’re likelier to google “rollover IRA” than “sex”.
9. You meet more men online than offline.
10. You watch more HGTV than MTV.
11. 40 doesn’t sound so old after all.
12. You while away your time making lists like this.

Surfing for porn in public places

I'm on a public computer on a college campus, and the kid next to me -- without any hesitation and not a full arm's length away -- is looking at porn. I don't mean to be a prude, but is it necessary to look at porn in a public place? Yes, I saw 'Avenue Q'... I understand that at its essence the "Internet is for porn". But still! As he traipses from site to site, my peripheral vision doesn't reveal if the fare is X-rated or XXX-rated, just that there's lots of naked people in strange positions. I guess today this is college, a place where I'm surrounded by people at least a decade younger than me checking their Hotmail in class on laptops with wireless access. Not all the time of course. Only when they tire of solitaire.

Gisele and the plunging dollar

We've all heard of a few of those boring, old economic indicators. You know… the Consumer Price Index, Gross Domestic Product, Crude Oil Prices and Gisele Bündchen. Huh??? That’s right – I said Gisele Bündchen. The supermodel who gets to prance around Rome and Paris and New York being young and beautiful and rich. And if that’s not enough she gets to do so in the company of Leo and Tom and other such young and beautiful and rich hotties. But I digress. Apparently Gisele no longer accepts modeling payment in dollars. Since the dollar has fallen to crazy lows against the British pound, the Canadian dollar and other currencies, she insists on euros. Media coverage of this significant macreconomic event suggest this is more bad news for the dollar. I wasn’t worried when I heard gas might hit $4 a gallon, but Gisele’s dollar decision has me panicked: What should I do about the millions of US dollars coming my way? I'm not a Eurobabe myself, but perhaps I could urgently convert to Bhutan ngultrums or Azerbaijan manats. Your two cents? Which by the way are worth less than ever...

For my fabulous fortysomething friend

One of my closest friends turned 40 today. (Because of the time change he got to celebrate his big day for 25 hours.) I said 'Happy Birthday', but I didn’t wait a second more to notify him that he's no longer allowed to read my thirtysomething blog. It's a big birthday for him, and he couldn't have asked for a better gift than that… right? All my loyal readers (all two of them) better be saying 'wrong' and keep reading – that was a trick question! Enough blabbing (er, blogging). Happy Birthday, T, and thanks for a decade of unwavering friendship!